Battle With the Britons! Read online

  For my wonderful friend

  and studio-mate, Sarah McIntyre

  Special thanks as always to Lizzie and Jack, and to Lucy,

  for their editorial and designer skillz and their deep reserves of patience

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either

  products of the author’s imagination or, if real, are used fictitiously.

  Copyright © 2016 by Gary Northfield

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, transmitted,

  or stored in an information retrieval system in any form or by any means,

  graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, taping, and

  recording, without prior written permission from the publisher.

  First U.S. electronic edition 2018

  Library of Congress Catalog Card Number pending

  This book was typeset in Stempel Schneidler.

  Candlewick Press

  99 Dover Street

  Somerville, Massachusetts 02144

  visit us at www.candlewick.com

  CONTENTS

  INTRODUCTION

  vi

  1: THE PEOPLE’S CHAMPION

  I

  2: ZEBRAMANIA!

  XVIII

  3: ROMAN HOLIDAY!

  XXXIII

  4: ALL ABOARD!

  XLIV

  5: STINK HOLE

  LIX

  6: GONE FISHING

  LXXI

  7: LAND OF HOPE AND GORY

  LXXXIII

  8: BRITON ROCK

  XCIV

  9: LONDINIUM CALLING

  CVI

  10: HOME AWAY FROM HOME

  CXIV

  11: MUD, SWEAT, AND TEARS

  CXXIV

  12: BRITONS GOT TALENT

  CXXXVIII

  13: PIGS MIGHT FLY

  CXLIV

  14: HOO NOO, BROON COO!

  CLIX

  15: HOLE LOT OF TROUBLE

  CLXXV

  16: BOIL AND BUBBLE

  CXCII

  17: WHEN IN LONDINIUM

  CCII

  18: HE CAME, HE SAW, HE LOCKED HIM UP

  CCXVI

  19: FINAL FRONTIER

  CCXXIII

  20: HADRIAN’S BRAWL

  CCXXVIII

  21: HE AIN’T HEAVY . . .

  CCXLIV

  22: BROTHERS IN ARMS

  CCLIV

  EPILOGUE

  CCLIX

  ROMAN NUMERALS

  CCLXIII

  FURTHER INFORMATION:

  CCLXVII

  WHAT THE ROMANS BROUGHT TO BRITAIN

  FELIX’S AWESOME ROCK COLLECTION

  CCLXXI

  INTRODUCTION

  So, you think you know about

  JULIUS

  ZEBRA?

  knowledgeable

  gnu

  Why, yes,

  I do!

  O

  U

  R

  H

  A

  N

  D

  S

  O

  M

  E

  H

  E

  R

  O

  !

  Well, you’re probably

  WRONG!

  W

  h

  a

  t

  ?

  O

  U

  T

  R

  A

  G

  E

  O

  U

  S

  !

  grumpy

  gnu

  Kind of a loser!

  Probably eaten

  by a lion ...

  CHOMP!

  N

  o

  t

  a

  g

  a

  i

  n

  !

  S

  ig

  h

  .

  .

  .

  Hates

  the

  stinky

  lake!

  Lick!

  W

  ha

  t

  most

  people

  THINK

  they

  know

  about

  JULIUS

  ZEBRA!

  B

  le

  u

  r

  g

  h

  !

  T

  a

  s

  t

  e

  s

  d

  is

  g

  u

  s

  t

  i

  n

  g

  !

  Mean

  brother!

  It’s

  all he

  deserves.

  Ha, ha!

  EEEEE!

  Put me down!

  G

  r

  o

  s

  s

  w

  a

  t

  e

  r

  I know

  it all!

  Likes eating oatmeal!

  Actually gets along

  well with lions!

  CHAM

  PION

  GLAD

  IATOR

  !

  Yum!

  But THIS is what

  he’s REALLY

  LIKE!

  C

  r

  u

  n

  c

  h

  y

  b

  e

  e

  t

  le

  s!

  Julius! Your

  sword!

  KLONK!

  K

  L

  O

  N

  K

  !

  O

  w

  !

  W

  a

  t

  c

  h

  it

  !

  See ya!

  ZEBRA!

  ZEBRA!

  This I

  gotta see!

  Ugh!

  What

  nonsense!

  J

  u

  li

  u

  s’

  s

  b

  r

  o

  t

  h

  e

  r

  ,

  B

  r

  u

  t

  u

  s

  There’s only one zebra

  champion in the world!

  Igno

  re

  him

  .

  He’s

  just

  jea

  lous

  !

  And that’s ME!

  EXCITING, RIGHT?

  Julius wasn’t quite like other zebras. Not only did

  he live during ROMAN TIMES, but he was also the

  We love

  you, Julius!

  Gasp!

  It’s really

  him!

  All hail

  Julius!

  Julius!

  Walking through the noisy, smelly, bustling streets

  of Rome, Julius felt like Caesar himself! The place

  smelled worse than a gnu’s backside, a lot like the

  stinky lake back home, but here, unlike back home,

  everybody LOVED him.

  CHAPTER ONE

  THE PEOPLE
’S

  CHAMPION

  This

  is the

  greatest

  day of

  my life.

  It’s true!

  You really

  exist!

  I do.

  Scurrying next to Julius was his friend Cornelius

  the warthog. Cornelius was a rather small fellow, and

  in the melee of the crowded street, he had to fight

  hard not to be stepped on.

  Since his triumphant, surprise victory at Rome’s

  greatest amphitheater, the Colosseum, only a month

  ago, Julius had been transformed into a GLADIATOR

  SUPERSTAR!

  Stories of his deeds had spread like wildfire

  throughout the vast empire. People were coming

  from all over just to see Julius fight, and he was loving

  every minute of it.

  Come on, Julius!

  We should

  head back!

  We don’t want

  to miss your

  big fight!

  “Stop panicking, Cornelius!” said Julius as he

  waved merrily to his fans. “We have PLENTY of time.

  Let the people of Rome enjoy their hero walking

  among them!”

  Cornelius tutted. “Careful — soon your head might

  get too big to walk down these narrow streets.”

  Just then, a scruffy young girl approached Julius,

  holding out a ratty parchment.

  Excuse me, Mr. Zebra,

  sir? May I have your

  hoofprint, please?

  I’m such

  a big fan

  of yours.

  Julius ruffled the little girl’s hair. “Of course, my

  dear little thing — do you have any ink?”

  The girl looked very sad. “No . . .” She sighed.

  Julius looked around the street to see what he

  could use to make a print. “How about if I dipped my

  hoof in mud? You’d have your very own Julius Zebra

  muddy hoofprint!”

  The little girl’s face lit up. “Oh, yes, please, Mr.

  Zebra. That would be wonderful! Thank you!”

  Julius bent down and squished his front right hoof

  into the mud, then placed it very carefully onto the

  girl’s parchment. He pulled his hoof away to reveal a

  perfect print.

  “THAT IS SO AMAZING! THANK YOU,

  MR. ZEBRA!” squeaked the girl. “I LOVE YOU!”

  She kissed the print and ran off to a group of her

  friends standing nearby, who all squealed like little

  mice and jumped for joy at such an exciting souvenir.

  Julius sniffed his hoof, screwing up his nostrils.

  “You know, I don’t think that was actually mud.”

  He passed his hoof

  to Cornelius to sniff.

  P.

  U.

  !

  And that

  girl kissed

  it, too!

  SQUEE!

  You will not

  believe what

  I just bought

  with my life

  savings!

  “Let me guess, Felix,” said Julius. “Is it a rock?”

  “Well,” said Felix proudly, “what I have here is

  an actual piece of the PYRAMID OF GIZA IN

  EGYPT!”

  “Quick!” said Cornelius. “Let’s go the other way.

  We’ll be long gone before she notices.” And they

  scooted off into the crowds.

  “WAIT!” cried a voice. “WHERE ARE YOU

  GOING? WAIT FOR ME!” From one of the many

  shops that lined the street bounded a lively antelope

  clutching a lump of rock.

  “Forget all that,” said Julius. “Where are the others?

  We promised to meet them here at noon!”

  “Yes!” agreed Cornelius. “As I keep saying, we

  need to head back to the Colosseum. Julius has an

  important fight this afternoon in front of the emperor

  to celebrate the Festival of Quinquatria!”

  My rocks are

  nonsense only to

  an untrained eye.

  Soon I’ll

  have the

  greatest rock

  collection

  in ROME!

  Cornelius examined the rock carefully. “The only

  ‘Giza’ this rock has seen is the sneaky geezer who

  sold you this worthless junk!” he said with a huff.

  “These Roman shopkeepers see you coming a mile

  away, Felix. I don’t know why you keep buying these

  stupid rocks.”

  The festival

  of Queen

  Coconut?

  What’s THAT

  all about?

  “The Festival of Quinquatria!” corrected Cornelius.

  “It is a festival to honor Minerva. She’s the goddess

  of wisdom, so it’s not surprising you’ve never heard

  of her.”

  “Well, that’s RUDE!” snorted Felix.

  Julius put his arms around his friends. “Stop it

  now, you two!” he said with a laugh. “Don’t forget,

  Emperor Hadrian has finally PROMISED us our

  FREEDOM if I win this fight!”

  “JULIUS!” cried a voice in the crowd. “JULIUS,

  WAIT!”

  We

  smashed

  the rotten

  Blues right

  off the

  track.

  The

  Gree

  ns

  won

  agai

  n!

  “Rufus found you a present, too!” she squealed.

  “He did?” asked Julius excitedly, clapping his

  hooves. A long shadow loomed over Julius, who

  looked up to see his friend Rufus the giraffe.

  “I did!” replied Rufus, and he handed a tiny

  statuette to the eager zebra.

  Julius turned around, expecting to greet one

  of his many fans, but was instead faced with the

  beaming sharp teeth of a smiling crocodile.

  “LUCIA!” said Julius, pleased to see his friend.

  “How was the chariot racing?”

  “A-MA-ZING!” she said.

  GASP!

  “That’s AWESOME!” exclaimed Felix. “It even

  has your crazy bug-eyes!”

  Julius fired a dirty look toward Felix. “WHAT

  crazy bug-eyes?”

  Rufus interjected, “They had a big stall selling

  hundreds of them! You are REALLY famous now!”

  As if on cue, an excited mob started to crowd

  around the animals to see the gladiator superstar

  walking down their street.

  “Look! It’s a

  figurine of YOU!”

  said Lucia.

  Julius!

  Julius!

  Our

  hero!

  Yikes!

  Let me

  touch your

  stripes!

  The animal friends pushed through the frenzied

  crowd onto the main road that ran through the

  heart of Rome. Dashing under the arches of the

  great aqueduct and past the grand palace that sat

  up on the hill, they headed for the huge stone

  stadium looming large on the horizon.

  “Come on!” said Cornelius. “We really should

  head back before this bunch tears us apart.”

  L

  a

  st

  o

  n

  e

  th

  e

  re

  is

  a

  n


  a

  n

  te

  lo

  p

  e

  ’s

  b

  o

  tt

  o

  m

  !

  I heard

  that!

  They raced past the crowd massing around

  the Colosseum and then dashed right PAST the

  Colosseum.

  Instead, they ran into an unassuming square

  building next to the amphitheater, past the gruff

  guards at the door, and into a huge courtyard that

  housed its own mini-arena.

  Quickly!

  This was Ludus Magnus, Rome’s biggest and best

  gladiator school and home to Julius and his pals.

  The click-clack of wooden swords could be heard as

  gladiators honed their fighting skills, but there was

  no time to stand and watch. They raced downstairs

  toward the tunnel that led directly to the underbelly

  of the Colosseum, only to find their way blocked

  by a scrawny, surly lion.

  Yo

  u’r

  e

  lat

  e!

  “Sorry, Milus!” gasped Julius, catching his

  breath. “But we had a terrible time trying to

  outrun my hordes of fans!”

  Milus just tutted and stepped to one side. “You

  have a hard life, Zebra,” he growled sarcastically.

  “Anyway, it’s not me you’ve got to apologize to.

  It’s PLINY!”

  Julius slapped his forehead with his hoof. “Oh,

  no! I promised Pliny I’d meet him early to brush up

  on those new sword moves he’s been teaching me.”

  FINALLY!

  Pliny!

  Glad you

  remembered

  me!

  The little mouse threw a gold helmet at Julius.

  “You’d better get yourself suited and booted!”

  he said. “If you’re ever gonna make a good

  impression in front of Hadrian, then today has to

  be the day!”

  He sprinted down the tunnel, the stench of the

  rancid dungeons hitting his nose as he ran. He

  careered around a corner, past the cages with the

  growling leopards, and toward one of the many

  lifts that brought the animals up into the arena.

  But what about the sword moves?

  We were

  going to

  practice

  them!

  “Aw, you don’t need no extra training!” Pliny

  laughed. “Your opponent is as useless as ALL the

  other animals you’ve had to face.” The little mouse

  gave Julius a friendly punch on his shin. “There

  ain’t no animal gladiator like YOU, Julianne!”

  “It’s JULIUS, not Julianne!” said Julius, rolling

  his eyes. “How many times do I have to tell you?”